Homecoming wasn’t the way I expected it to be. The city I lived for the majority of my life has changed. The streets are now more crowded than when I left in 2013. Traffic is worse. Pollution is getting worse. And what’s even worse—is the treatment and portrayal of women. Oh, by the way, my friends also changed—a lot!
Change is inevitable and a part of life. But it pains me to see how abrupt and fast change has been in my dear community in Cebu City, Philippines. I was on culture shock when I first stepped out of the airplane. My family and close friends were there to welcome me. After a week of trying to adjust myself back to my home context, my friends told me that I have changed.
One afternoon while I am on my way to the airport with my parents to pick up my sister. We come across street vendors who are running when they saw the local police car approaching to arrest illegal street vendors. Those younger persons were able to run far but the old woman, is struggling to carry her basket-full of green mangoes along with a chair and a bag of other fruits. She couldn’t run and so the police caught her.
One of the police officers dragged her to the car and trying to confiscate her basket because she was selling in a prohibited area. She didn’t let go and said, “Sir, please I have a family to feed and I don’t have any profit yet for the day. If you take my things from me, we would have nothing. Please forgive me this time. It won’t happen again.”
The police officer keep pulling her basket. The old woman was down on the floor, holding tightly the only thing that could feed her family.
If you knew me three years back, I would have just tried to walk by this scene and go on with my life. But I couldn’t this time.
I stand behind the woman. I couldn’t say anything. In my mind I was thinking, “What am I doing here? If this goes wrong I could get arrested. So what? I don’t care. What are the new city ordinances now about illegal vending? What should I say? And so on…”
I am staring at the police the entire time while standing behind the woman. I didn’t move. I am giving him the look that I will never leave the woman until he’s the one who would give up first and leave. We stand here for almost 30 minutes. People started to stop and watch the male police dragging the old woman. Then he stopped. We won. The woman, gasping, cries as she watches the police car leave the area. She can keep her basket and other belongings. I applaud her for being strong-willed. As I see her fixing herself and feeling well, I left.
My parents saw the entire drama (as they called it). There were several times that they attempted to pull me out of the scene. They said I changed.
My family, friends, church have told me that I have changed (including the food I like to eat; the music I listen—vallenato, bachata, salsa; the words I speak—sometimes I speak Spanish to everyone unconsciously).
Then it hit me. I wasn’t just changed. I was transformed. This is what I’ve been sharing to my colleagues and other young adults about Global Mission Fellow journey—my experience in Colombia, working with CEPALC in using communication tools to uplift the dignity of people, especially confronting injustice issues of gender and violence against women and children—has transformed my perspective of the world, through the LENS OF JUSTICE.
Lens of justice
I was convinced before that gender issues and inequality among men and women in the Philippines were not as pervasive as Colombia.
But coming home with a new pair of lens—a lens of justice—made me realize how wrong I was. I see younger women accompanying older northwestern male foreigners, and at one occasion, touching a young girls private organ in public.
There were so times as well that I had to interfere scenes of violence in public places, giving awareness to the public to these horrible acts.
So yes, I have transformed. I could clearly see now of what is really happening in our city, in our country. I could see how poor our policies are in defending women’s rights and eradicating violence against women. I could clearly see how other women choose to ignore these facts and move on with their lives, just because they are not affected.
In one of my conversations with a friend who’s is soon-to-be-lawyer, we talked about infidelity cases where men can easily get away with it but women is usually condemned more. How women are treated unfairly in trials and how judges favor the men more. I was glad to hear his point of views on how unjust these cases are and that women and men in this case should be processed equally as human beings and not based on their gender or the religious aspect. I was impressed by his stand and I was glad that finally I have someone to talk about gender equality.
As we continue to talk about the topic, we come to the issue of marriage. I told him that I would want my husband to change his last name to mine if we get married. Or we can both use hyphen in our last names. However, the mood of the conversation shifted. He is against it. He said that the symbol of unity between the union of a husband and a wife, and both their families, is the last name of the husband. In other words, he believes only that unity happens when the woman changes her last name with the husband. I tell you it was a heated discussion.
There is so much work that is needed in my beloved country Philippines. One example is the pervasive cybersex in my city. It is becoming a major problem in the city and the entire province. More parents are forcing their children to participate in this act to earn easy and fast money. Local government units, especially in the provincial areas, don’t have concrete laws against this crime, which is why they could not arrest the perpetrators—who are mostly white foreigners.
I went back home, expecting things to be the same. But it’s not. The world is becoming more evil as days pass.
I guess this is really what my professor in the university used to say, “The more you know, the more you don’t know.”
Transition
It was really hard for me to transition back to Cebu and the Philippines in general. It pains me to see how many young women accompany (in a negative way) northwestern foreigners in public places. I ended up staying at the house for a few days just to absorb everything I observed.
Transition is never easy. There are so many things I want to work with. I want to create change immediately back home. I was excited to share my transforming journey about gender justice and rights of women and children. I was excited to share my new pairs of lens—the lens of justice. But the question is, are my family, friends, community, church ready for it?
Two years being gone from Cebu City was a long time. It was not even easy for my friends to relate with me. Although we had been talking on Skype and Facebook for several occasions when I was in Colombia, still they couldn’t get everything I was talking.
I remember one of the points of Rev. Gary Paterson, moderator of the United Church in Canada, when he came to Colombia and talked about the LGBTTQs in the church, he said, “it takes 50 years to change a country…”
Well, perhaps I was rushing too much when I came back to the Philippines. I wanted to see transformation in my friends’ perspectives, in my church’s response to social injustice. I should slow down. I don’t want to see again the curious and doubtful expressions of my friends when I talk about advocacies and fighting for social justice.
Now, I am still in contact with family, friends, and the church. I still share with them my passion on issues on gender justice and women equality. I still get a weird look but this time, they give more attention to our conversation.
Recently, one of my mentors asked me what my long-term plan is after serving as a mission advocate for the young adult mission service, General Board of Global Ministries of the United Methodist Church. It made me reflect of what my passion is and my goals are.
I said, “I will proceed to study a master’s degree. I am looking at studying a Master’s in Women Studies and Development. And I will go back to the Philippines and organize a group of colleagues in the fields of journalism, legal, governmental, corporate, advocacy, education, administration, etc. to discuss about women and gender issues and do something about it. (What specifically? I don’t know yet. I could use your help in planning this.) ”
I want to take advantage of what I learned and experienced in Colombia to a higher calling and service in my home country, The Philippines. I want to further explore the history of women revolution, our rights, our territory—our body, our call to human dignity and equality among all human beings. I can’t keep the stories of brave women I met in Colombia: from Bogota through the ecumenical group, to the community of Zenu, to the women in the church and even throughout Latin America, through the SICSAL women’s assembly. I want to bring these stories back home and channel them into my home context so that other women would be empowered and would stand up to raise their voice.
iam31 